To those who are not married, those who are getting married, those who have just married, those who are thinking of separating, those who have just separated, those who are thinking of getting back together…
There are not several types of love, just as there are not three types of longing, four types of hatred, or six types of envy. LOVE IS UNIQUE, like any other feeling, whether it is directed towards family members, a spouse, or God.
The difference is that, since there are no blood ties between husband and wife, SEDUCTION must be uninterrupted…
Because there is no guarantee of durability, any change in tone of voice weakens us, and with each demand, we end up burying a relationship that could have been eternal.
They got married. I love you here, I love you there. Beautiful, but unsustainable.
A successful marriage requires more than romantic declarations.
Between two people who decide to share the same roof, there has to be much more than love, and sometimes, it doesn’t even need to be such intense love.
First and foremost, there must be RESPECT.
Zero aggression.
A willingness to listen to others’ arguments.
Some patience…
Love alone is not enough. There can be no competition. No comparisons. You have to be flexible, to accept rules that were not previously agreed upon.
There must be GOOD HUMOUR to deal with the unexpected, bouts of neediness, childishness.
You have to know how to handle it.
Love alone is not enough.
There has to be intelligence. A brain programmed to deal with premenstrual tension, rejection, unexpected dismissals, bills to pay. You have to have the discipline to raise children, set an example, not shout.
You have to have a good psychiatrist.
It’s not enough to just love.
Among couples who unite with the aim of a long-lasting marriage, there has to be a little silence, childhood friends, a life of their own, time for each other.
There has to be trust. A certain camaraderie, sometimes pretending not to see, pretending not to hear. You have to understand that union does not necessarily mean fusion.
And that loving “only” is not enough.
Among men and women who think that LOVE IS ONLY POETRY, there must be discernment, a down-to-earth attitude, rationality. You have to know that love can be good, it can last forever, but that alone it is not enough.
Love is great, but it is not two.
You have to know whether that love is good for you or not; if it is not good for you, it is not love. You need to summon a group of feelings to support this love that carries the burden of omnipotence. Love may be enough for us, but it is not enough on its own.
Good love to those who already have it! Good luck to those who are looking for it!
And happiness to us all!